Resting in Pieces

Don't worry, I feel fine. Today though, I have been thinking about what will happen after I shed this mortal coil. What will happen to me when I pass away?

I am not thinking about the whereabouts of my soul in the afterlife. My mind is on much more practical matters: What will my loved ones do with my remains? Since I don't wish to take up valuable real estate in some cemetery, I would prefer to be cremated. This presents some problems for my survivors. They either have to find a fitting place to scatter the ashes the funeral home has told them are mine, or find a stylish urn to place them in.

Ideally, I would love to have my ashes scattered across Disneyland. Apparently, though, this is against Disney company policy. That's a shame. For any child vacationing in the Magic Kingdom, my ash-scattering ceremony would be something they would never forget, try though they may.

Since I can't be strewn about where I wish to be, I guess my family will have to plunk me in an urn. I was worried, until recently, that finding a suitable vessel would be a challenge. Was there an urn out there that would honor the good taste and dignity that have been the hallmark of my life?

I needn't have worried. I will have the dignified, tasteful resting place I deserve, thanks to this company.

Please don't let all this morbid musing bring you down, though. Really! I feel fine!