Wednesday, November 19, 2008

I Love Lillian

With the Holidays fast approaching, those of you who can actually afford to purchase Christmas gifts this year may be stumped over the perfect presents to get your loved ones. Don't worry, I'm here to help.

I suggest you look no further than The Lillian Vernon Catalog!

If you don't own a postal address, you may be unfamiliar with Lillian's circular. It seems to arrive virtually every other week, and is chock-full of knick-knacks, gadgets, gizmos, decor, questionable fashion choices and many other things you never thought you wanted or needed. As an added bonus, you can get seemingly every item  personalized with your loved one's (or your own)  name. FOR FREE!

Need a "World's Best Grandma" tee shirt? They have 'em! A (personalized) dog whistle key chain? It's here. Have you been scouring the stores for a cape that will catch the hair when you get a trim? Is there someone on your list who wants a (personalized) airplane clock? Look no further, Lillian has all these items and more.

She also has one item for the Holidays that I find especially endearing. Let's say your Uncle Joe (or whomever) has recently passed on. You will surely miss him, especially his annual tradition of getting loaded at your Christmas party and accidently trying to exit your home through the downstairs closet. Wouldn't it be nice to remember him with a special, personalized (of course) imitation silver tree ornament engraved with the verse:

"I WENT AWAY,
BUT DON'T SHED A TEAR,
I'M SPENDING MY CHRISTMAS,
WITH JESUS THIS YEAR."

Although this poem may be misinterpreted by some as meaning Uncle Joe has snubbed you for a better party, I find the sentiment touching. At least your loved ones will feel he's having a nice Holiday someplace.

Yes, The Lillian Vernon catalog has it all.

I just hope I haven't ruined any surprises for those of you on my gift list!



 

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8 Comments:

Blogger Pepper Potts said...

This catalog, I'm embarrassed to admit, has served me well over the years. I've gotten teacher gifts, useless junk for myself, and of course, Christmas gifts and decorations.

I mean who doesn't appreciate Nutcracker chair covers or a monogrammed ice bucket?

Of course the greatest benefit--when you do order something from Lillian Vernon, you'll be on their mailing list for life!

In the least, it makes for good bathroom reading. :-)

November 19, 2008 at 2:12 PM  
Blogger Maggie's Mom said...

...am I getting the dog whistle?

November 19, 2008 at 3:53 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

November 19, 2008 at 7:53 PM  
Blogger Maggie's Mom said...

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

November 20, 2008 at 7:05 PM  
Blogger Bill White said...

Wow! This blog has become such a lightning rod of controversy, I now have to delete comments!

November 20, 2008 at 9:38 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I love your drawings. Is this what you do for a living to support your family? Great work. Keep it up.

November 21, 2008 at 7:19 PM  
Blogger Bill White said...

Dear Anonymous,

Yes, yes I do.

November 22, 2008 at 12:47 AM  
Blogger Emily said...

I thought Lillian Vernon went out of business. The DC in our town shut down over a year ago. Nice to know she is still around.

Heck yeah, I bought her stuff. My kids have robes and overnight bags with their names on them.

November 24, 2008 at 11:31 AM  

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