Thursday, October 16, 2008

True Life Adventures

I am a smoker. I know it is bad for you and all that, but I like smoking. I am not, however, one of those habitual smokers that always has a fag hanging from his lips (that came out wrong). I just enjoy an occasional puff now and again.

Since my Perfect Wife does not allow me to smoke in the house, I have to step out onto my back porch to enjoy a smoke. I usually just take a drag or two, then gently snuff out the cigarette and leave it propped in the ashtray, and return to it later. Gross, you may say, but it makes a pack last longer, which is always important in these precarious financial times.

Lately, when I return to re-light my cigarette, there is nothing in the ashtray. Formerly, I attributed this to my well-known faulty memory: I must have already finished that tube of tobaccoy goodness, I assumed.

I was wrong.

The other day, I was going outside to re-light my butt (again, that sounds wrong), when I saw a giant raccoon STEALING MY HALF SMOKED CIGARETTE! I know raccoons are the bad boys of the suburban animal kingdom, but SMOKING?

I just hope they like Marlboro Light 100's...

4 Comments:

Blogger Pepper Potts said...

I guess they don't call them bandits for nothing!

I love the drawing! Thanks for the laugh.

October 16, 2008 at 3:49 PM  
Blogger Gary Fields said...

Looks like we're gonna have to call the ASPCA on you, Billy, to save these poor raccoons from gettin' lung cancer! Hope all's going well, pal. Thanks for checkin' out my blog. Your stuff still looks so effortless!

October 16, 2008 at 10:44 PM  
Blogger Bill White said...

Thanks for the comments, kids. BTW, everybody who looks at this blog, should check out Gary's blog. As he is one of my bestest pals, I may be biased, but I love his work.

Pepper doesn't have a blog, but believe me, she's worth checking out!

October 17, 2008 at 8:57 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Jerry and I have really enjoyed reading your site, especially after receiving that wonderful autographed drawing, it's already hanging in our sports basement, yes we really have a sports basement!

October 19, 2008 at 12:08 PM  

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