Monday, August 30, 2010

Earwigging Out!

Well, Summer is just about over, and thank Goodness for that. This wasn't our most enjoyable season ever. You may have noticed a drop in the frequency and quality in the posting here lately? Well, this Summer gets all the blame. Not much happened 'round these parts that was really worth blogging about (although some  wags out there might argue that very little I write about is worth posting, and I might agree, that is a topic for another time). 

Even our previously mentioned trip to the exotic vacation destination of Ithaca, NY was rather dull. The only "highlights" of that soggy trip were a visit to the smelliest Arby's™ restaurant ever, and a brief visit to America's Filthiest Rest Stop. The stop is in Worcester, NY if you're wondering. Words cannot do justice to the horrors I experienced there. The urinals were cleaner than the sinks. Take my advice, if you're driving on I-90 and really have to "make a deposit" either suck it in and keep driving, or pull over, grab a shovel, and make your own facilities. What I'm trying to say is it was really dirty. 

With Summer finally fading, I remembered I never wrote a column about one of the things about the season that I especially dislike, something that really "bugs" me. I'm talking, of course, about BUGS.

I hate all kinds of bugs, moths, mosquitoes, ants- If it crawls, creeps or buzzes, keep it away  from me. There is one creepy-crawlie though, that I really can't stand. The Earwig.

I think I don't like them because they look so harmful. That lil' pincher on their bum looks like it could give you a painful pinch. Another point against them is the story that they climb into your ears while you sleep and burrow into your brain. Not a comforting thought when you see one or more of these little critters skittering around your house.

After a bit of research, however, it turns out my prejudice against Earwigs was totally misplaced. According to this, Earwigs are completely harmless to humans. Even their pinchers can't pinch you. As for the story of them digging into your cranium, that is false too, of course. Granted, I did first hear of that behavior from an episode of Rod Serling's "Night Gallery" TV show on an episode entitled "Caterpillar" when I was a lad. Anyone who has seen that episode remembers what a complete creep-out it was. If you haven't seen it, do yourself a favor, and never see it. Much like you wouldn't want to use the rest stop in Worcester, NY, you don't want to see that show, and you'd be grateful for the heads up. 

Another thing to remember is that you really shouldn't count on programs like "Night Gallery" for accurate scientific information. When you think of all the negative feeling towards Earwigs that episode generated, you almost feel bad for the little creeps. Almost.

They still are not welcome in my home.

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4 Comments:

Blogger P.L. Frederick said...

I have another good friend who is horrified by earwigs. Horrified. He too is a he. I helped him deal with that fear, for in my 20s I was not so kind as I am today. Annoyed, I told him, my housemate at the time, that while he was sleeping I would take my Exact-o knife and slice off his eyelids. Today, earwigs are his #2 fear.

That Filthiest Rest Stop sounds really, realllly disgusting. You should receive a Certificate of Completion. A bowling trophy. Something.

That is all.

P.L. Frederick (Small & Big)

August 30, 2010 at 6:31 PM  
Blogger David said...

Oh man, that was the best episode of Night Gallery ever. I was only 10 when I first saw it, so it left quite an impression!

August 30, 2010 at 8:40 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

sorry to hear that your vacation was a bust.
i rarely take vacations, as the amount of work it takes to prepare/pack/unpack does not seem worth the few days of relaxtion you hope to get before and after all that work.
not to mention all the work that piles up at your job that you then have to deal with.

eeteed

August 31, 2010 at 12:28 PM  
Blogger MikeH said...

Night Gallery was quite the source for scientific tidbits in it's day (which itself is quite a scary thought!).

August 31, 2010 at 6:48 PM  

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